The sweet creamy monstrosity once known as “Big Butter Jesus,” having melted in a lightning-induced inferno in June 2010, is proving true to its namesake: It will rise again. The Solid Rock Church of Monroe, Ohio, has commissioned a replacement statue with features worthy of Lee Majors—52 feet tall, wind resistance (up to 110 mph), a lightning-suppression system, and a Class 1 fire rating. The specs are less reminiscent of Christ’s commission to Peter (“and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it”) and more evocative of the postal worker’s pledge, (“Neither rain, nor sleet, nor dark of night…”).
Sensitive to the less-than-sensitive criticism the statue’s predecessor garnered, the church has decided to replace the buttery hue with “concrete” color and has christened (after a manner of speaking) the statue with the name LuxMundi—Latin for “light of the world.” Appreciative as I am of the Latin nod, I don’t think there’s much hope for dignity in the circumstances.
Those in the statue’s inner circle are calling it “Hug Me, Jesus.”
Photo courtesy of Suvro Datta, FreeDigitalPhotos.net.