A few years back, my husband and my teenage cousins just about blew up the Internet by going to Google to learn how to create a “Mii” character of Admiral Ackbar from “Star Wars” for use in playing Wii Sports.
Aside from that being a plainly surreal moment (My husband’s age at the time? 36!), I was pretty sure it taught me a fundamental truth: You can find anything conceivable on the wacky, wild Interwebs.
So imagine my disappointment when I Googled “Am I doing enough?” and got a whole lot of nothing.
I took another stab with “Am I getting it right?” Yet again, little came up besides diet-related articles and now-defunct posts from quaint Blogger pages of yore.
One last search — “Am I enough?” — gave me a depressing mommy blog and the harsh, disturbing truth that not even Google can help me now.
As it happens, even the universe’s most powerful search engine can’t answer the Really Big Questions. The problem is, neither can I.
Maybe it’s because I’m a woman. Maybe it’s because I grew up as an overachieving nerd. Maybe it’s because the sitcom concept of “Catholic guilt” is more rooted in reality than we’d like to believe. But whatever the reason, I lose hours a day to intermittent spurts of wondering if I’m even in the ballpark of “doing” life correctly.
If I’m generally nice to people, is that enough? I’m honest and I care about others — does that get me to Heaven?
But if I spend a lot of money on a vacation, it’s money I could have used to donate to the poor. Am I being a self-indulgent greed-monger?
What does it really mean to give one’s life to God?
How comfortable is too comfortable? How happy is too happy?
What defines whether you’ve given your life to Christ?
And if God doesn’t give me a report card, how do I know if I’m passing the test?
Al Gore apparently didn’t invent the World Wide Web to handle the RBQ’s. Meanwhile, I can get a video telling me “How to build a jetpack.”
This is where you come in; I seriously could use your thoughts and wisdom.
How do you know if you’re getting it right?
How do you know if you’re good enough?
How do you make your life count for something that matters?